Here's What I Learnt From Jordan B Peterson’s Personality Lectures (2017)

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Your Brain will leave you alone if.

The only way your brain will leave you alone, and not let negative events that happened in the past affect your behavior, is by thinking through such negative events. In simple terms, the only way forward is to face what you fear (a result of negative events in the past) and what you are avoiding. You need to go back to such terrible experiences which you don't fully understand and try to fully understand them (which is what psychotherapy does).

It doesn't stop there, you also need to figure out how to not make it happen EVER AGAIN. If not, there is a big chance that the same event will reappear and repeat itself in your lifetime, and it will keep doing so until you finally learn the lesson behind it all. This is the only way to transform and develop oneself and expand your personality.

This brings me to the dragon myth. The dragon underground (sometimes a snake) comes out every once in a while and threatens your state of being. The dragon represents your darkest fears, which are causing an underdeveloped self. In most stories, someone volunteers to slay the dragon and comes back with a prize (a woman or gold). These stories are admired and read as they are fictional representations of ourselves and our lives. “You learn through voluntary contact with what frightens and disgusts you.” SO, FACE YOUR DRAGON (aka your fears).

Admire and Despise

Everyone has an implicit value structure that plays a part in you admiring or despising someone. You admire someone if there is something about them that you value and would like to be able to do. On the other hand, you might despise someone you felt was doing something wrong and according to your implicit value structure, it would be wrong if you did it too.

People won't mess with you if…

Your face and stance are big indicators of whether someone can mess with you or not. Having a determined and assertive face/stance will most likely ensure that people won't mess with you, to begin with. However, having a face that says I'll take anything coming my way gives an impression that people can mess with you, and they probably will.

Modern people think sex is…

People nowadays think sex is like drinking water, a harmless necessity. However, everything about sex is dangerous. The emotional and social consequences of sex are inevitable. And not to forget, it results in unwanted pregnancy and sickness.

Defense Mechanisms.

Defense mechanisms include:

• Repression
• Denial
• Reaction formation
• Displacement
• Identification
• Rationalization
• Intellectualization
• Sublimation
• Projection

Some of the defense mechanisms are self-explanatory, others not so much. For instance, reaction formation means you replace a thought or impulse with thoughts and impulses that are of the total opposite nature and express it that way. “I really really really like my sister, when you really don't”. Displacement is when one displaces a negative emotion from the source and dumps it onto someone or something else. Shouting at your kids for no reason because your boss insulted you at work that day is a good example. Identification is conforming ones self to fit a group. “I am bullied, so I become the bully”. Sublimation is when one channel unacceptable impulses into something acceptable and productive. “I’ll sculpt naked women when I really want to be with many people or be in a relationship.”.

Why bother knowing yourself?

“So you don't suffer stupidly and cause others around you to suffer too.”

“What makes you think that having everything you ever asked for will satisfy you?”

“What if being dissatisfied is what satisfies you?”. “What if limits and values are what give life meaning?” (not nihilism: the belief in nothing). “What makes people think that providing economic security would be sufficient?”. Mind-blowing questions Peterson mentioned to ask ourselves about suffering. Is suffering the essence of life?

Envision Your Life

In 3–5 years what would your life look like? What do you want out of friendships, family, career, time outside your job, mental, and physical health? As you think about the answer to all of the above, you can then establish goals to create a long-term ideal life that you have in mind. Not setting goals leads to failing all the time. If you don't like to specify your goals it's because you don't like to specify conditions to failure. A simple diagram can be seen below simplifying what happens when you do set up goals.

“No goal no positive emotion.”